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  • 진보라는 것은 변화와는 거리가 멀고 오히려 기억에 의존한다. 과거를 기억하지 못하는 사람은 과거를 반복할 운명이다.
    - 조지 산타야나, 이성의 삶


조회 수 15 추천 수 0 댓글 0
1. Prologue / Cantata For A First Date
2. Stud And A Babe, A
3. Single Man Drought
4. Why? 'Cause I'm A Guy
5. Tear Jerk
6. I Will Be Loved Tonight
7. Hey There, Single Guy/Girl
8. Satisfaction Guaranteed
9. He Called Me
10. Cantata (Reprise) / Wedding Vows
11. Cantata (Reprise) / Always A Bridesmaid
12. Baby Song, The
13. Marriage Tango
14. On The Highway Of Love
15. Waiting Trio
16. Cantata - (reprise)
17. Shouldn't I Be Less In Love With You?
18. I Can Live With That
19. Epilogue / I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change


Prologue/Cantata for a First Date lyrics



Woman 1
And the Lord God said, "Let there be light." And there was light.

Man 1
And the Lord God said, "Let there be man and woman."

Woman 2
And there was man and woman

Man 2
That night man asked woman if she was busy

Woman 2
And woman said, "Thank you, she'd have to check.

Woman 1
But she's interested in anything long term, she still wants to see other people.

Women 1/2
He he he he he he he he he he he he

Man 2
And man said, "There are no other people"

Man 1/2
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Woman 1
And woman said ok how about this,
We get married, you vow you're eternal love for me,
I expell a bunch of miniature humans
Who are totally depended on us for 18 years.

Woman 2
You get a job, you stay home weekends,
And you never see another women naked for the rest of your life.

Man 2
And man said

Man 1/2
Ah ah ah ah ah

Women 1
And then thousands

Man 1
And thousands

Women 2
And thousands

Man 2
And thousands of years past

Women 1
And as for man and women...

Man 1
First date, new romance, clean shirt, pressed pants,
Aftershave, deoderent, electric razor, veloments.

Man 2
Mouthwash, toothpaste, bring the condoms just in case,
Macho boy, slick the hair, modern man, debonair.

Man 1
I will splash on must.

Man 2
I will knot my tie.

Man 1/2
And before I go I will check my fly.
It is women who have turned me into this.
A quaff up and dry cleanded guy.

Women 1
Facial creme from a spa, lingerie, wonder bra,
Hairspray, hairspritz, wax the legs, shave the pits.

Women 2
Appitite, coy and pert, don't eat much,
No dessert, sweet and low, half and half, smile a lot, fake a laugh.

Women 1
I have primed and plucked

Women 2
I have rubbed on nair.

Women 1/2
I have spent two hours on my face and hair.
And I did all this for a guy I barely know, and I bet he won't even care.

Man 1
I'll behave real well. Show her just the good stuff only.

Man 2
I could weave a spell, if I lie about somethings.

Woman 1
I hope he's mature, unlike every guy I've dated.

Woman 2
Still I will endure, somewhere someone dreams of me.

Man 1
But I got baggage, emotioal baggage, a plane load of baggage,
That causes much saggage, everybody.

All
We've got baggage, emotional draggage,
And we've been logging around this baggage a long long time.

All (spoken)
Time!?! Shit!!!!!!!!

All
Will my hopes be met? Will my fear dispell?
Will I captivate? Or will I repel?
Will I show him/her just how wonderful I am?
Or will I be a date from hell?

All
First date, new romance, different partner, same dance,
Ready now, almost time, here we go, door bell chime.

All at same time:
Men: Women: (faster)
I'll behave real well Facial creme from a spa
Show her just the lingere wonder bra
good stuff only I hairspray hairspritz
could weave a spell wax the legs shave the
If I lied about some pits. Appatite coy and
things. pert, don't eat much no
dessert, sweet and low
half and half smile a
lot fake a laugh

All
Here I go once more, fishing for another lover,
One more waiting door, one more very long long shot.

Man 1
Will this be a waste?

Woman 1
Or will I strike gold?

Man 2
Will my life be chase?

Woman 2
God, I'm getting old.

(door bell rings)

All (spoken)
HI.




Stud and a Babe lyrics


Women 1
I sit here trying to impress and make this guy aw struck.
But every subject I address make me sound like such a shmuck.

Man 1
Its not that I can't be diverting, sometimes I can even thrill,
But I'd just be so much better at flirting, if i only had looks that kill.
If I were a stud.

Women 1
If I were a babe.

Man 1
The kind of guy girls love.

Women 1
The kind of girl guys crave.
My breasts would be rounder.

Man 1
My pex would asound her.

Women 1
My legs would be longer.

Man 1
My buns would be stronger.

Women 1
My locks would be flowing

Man 1
My chest hair would be showing.

Women 1
My hips would be slimmer.

Man 1
My butt would just simmer.

Both
Oh oh oh

Women 1
I'm gonna go up and seduce him.

Both
Oh oh oh

Man 1
She'll be begging me for more.

Both
Oh oh oh

Women 1
Yea tonight I'm gonna goose him.

Man 1
Tonight I'm gonna score yeah!
A stude

Women 1
A Babe

Man 1
She'll love.

Women 1
He'll crave

Both
Oh oh oh
If I were a....

(dialogue)

Man 1
Julie, I'm not stud.

Women 1
I'm not a babe.

Man 1
I'm not a guy girls love.

Women 1
Well, I'm not a girl guys crave.

Man 1
Really?

Women 1
I'm awkward and whiney

Man 1
My biceps are tiny

Women 1
I'm not to athletic

Man 1
My clothes are sinthetic

Women 1
My nails are all chewed off

Man 1
My hair is all glued on

Women 1
My hips are all gulpy

Man 1
Well mine are real lumpy

Both
Oh oh oh

Women 1
Every night I'm always snoring.

Both
Oh oh oh

Man 1
Yea my feet can really stink

Both
Oh oh oh

Women 1
Yea I'm homely and I'm boring

Man 1
Well let me buy you one more drink

Women 1
Yea

Man 1
No stud

Women 1
No babe

Man 1
I love

Women 1
I crave

Both
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh




Single Man Drought lyrics


Man 1 (spoken)
And thats why I love airodynamic engineering.

Women 2 (spoken)
Wow Bob, what a long story.

Man 1 (spoken)
So anything to start?

Women 2 (spoken)
Oh no Bob no appatizer for me, I'm a very light eater. (sang) I'm lying
(spoken) Plus I didn't get to the gym, and generally I go every single day.
(sang) I'm really lying.

Man 1 (spoken)
Veronica, you are one special lady, I could talk to you all night.

Women 2
Please God don't let him.

Man 2 (spoken)
But my real passion is golf. Do you like golf?

Women 1 (spoken)
Of course! (sang) I'm lying

Man 2 (spoken)
Do you play?

Women 1 (spoken)
Oh surley. (sung) Oh boy I'm lying.

Man 2 (spoken)
We gotta play some time.

Women 1 (spoken)
Your course or mine.

Both (laugh)

Women 1
Who is this women talking

Man 2 (spoken)
Hey did you ever see the greatest golf movie ever made, Cattyshack?

Women 1 (spoken)
Loved it! (sung) I didn't see this movie.

Man 2 (spoken)
What was your favorite scene?

Women 1
Help me

Women 2
Help me

Both
Help me

Man 1 (spoken)
So the difference between fuel exhaust and fuel enjection is really simple. ha ha ha

Women 2
To think he thinks he's at his best, no thought tonight has he represed.
He talks and talks and eyes my breast there's a serious single man drought.

Women 1
Now some would say a catch I found.
He's single, straight, his mind is sound.
There's four guys left like him around.
There's a serious single man drought.

Women 2
I can't believe he's talking still.

Women 1
Oh God I need a scotch refill.

Women 2
He chews

Women 1
He spews

Both
I could use a pill. There's a serios single man drought.

Women 1
Standards, I used to have some standards.
But man by man every standerd meaindered from me.

Women 2
Lesbian, I should be a lesbian.
If I was born to love women how wondersully sain I would be.

Man 2 (spoken)
And who is your favorite Cattyshack actor?

Women 1 (spoken)
Oh, uh, well you know, that person, that wacky nutty, nutty, golf thingy, guy.

Man 2 (spoken)
Chevy Chase?

Women 1 (spoken)
Yes

Man 2 (spoken)
Me too.

Women 1
I could grow old, alone just fine.

Women 2
I'll buy some cats like 29.

Both
They'll find me dead in my feline shrine.
There's a serious single man drought.
So I date bob and hope and flirt, he might get better by dessert.
I stay, I pray, still I assert, there's a serious single man, deleirous single man...

Both Men
And let me take care of the check.

Both Women
Lets split it.

Women 1
I'm lying

Women 2
I'm lying

Both
I'm really lying

Both Men
No its on me

Both Women
You bet your sweet macho gold card it is.
Cause there's a serious, delierious, severious, varbirious, send
the marines we're talking serious, single man drought! (click) Ladies room!




Tear Jerk lyrics


Man 2
So I go, lets do dinner and a flick.
So she goes, well, you certainly move quick.
So I go, well your so lovely that you make my heart just ache.
So she goes, well what movie should we do?
So I go, well that is fully up to you.
And that my friends was my one big mistake.
My movie satisfaction is mindless violent action,
Some muscle men to tussel with Stalone.
A thriller that would thrill us, with Aronold or Bruce Willis,
And lots of naked shots of Sharon Stone.
This movie here is clawing so pretty and annoying,
These flicks they make for chicks who drag their men.
I ben she gets all weepy while I get really sleepy,
No chick will ever pick the flick again.

Women 2
She loves he, but he is married to a wife whose dying really slow.
He will grive so they're all happy, how beautiful, he's dutiful, that Joe!

Man 2
I yearn to see a chainsaw, a phsyco with a painsaw,
How nice to see 'em slice each persons splean.
A nut job in this movie, oh boy, would that be groovy,
He'd wipe this painful tripe right off the screen.

Women 2
The end is near, he's at her bedside, while he's true love waits for him, amen.

Man 2
She don't look good, she's on the dead side.

Women 2
And now Joe vows he'll never love again.

Man 2
Well that is rather queer now, did I just feel, a tear now,
I bet its just some sweat caught in my eye.
Well that is fairly funny, my nose feels rather runny.
Good God this might sound odd but I might cry.

Women 2
Oh God they're at the grave now.

Man 2
And Joe is acting brave now, I'm fearful I'll be tearful any sec.

Women 2
Oh God

Man 2
I know that she'll burn rubber, if I sit here and blubber I'm quickly growing sickly I'm a wreck.

Women 2
Oh God

Man 2
Think of thought more whistfull, Clint Eastwood with a fistfull,
Of oozy guns and boozy broads galore.
Oh crap, its just not working this movie is tear jerking,
This fellow will be jello on the floor.
I gotta get a grip now,
(Women 2, Joe won't cry, he's too strong)
simply can sit now, if I close my eyes tight cause
I'm a guy, no whimprine like a puppy,
I gotta machouppy how how will I allow myself to cry.
Oh my God.

Women 2 (spoken)
Are you ok?

Man 2 (spoken)
I'm fine, allergies.

Women 2 (spoken)
I love men who aren't afraid to cry at the movies.





I Will Be Loved Tonight lyrics


Woman 1:
Well, pop the champagne, break out the cologne;
turn up the monnlight and turn off the phone.
Well, what a surprise, a man is in sight; and I will be loved tonight.
To fondle his skin, to savor his lips;
to nuzzle his chin, to movie with his hips. our words wil be soft as we softly ignite;
and I will be loved tonight.
You can go from week to week, you can go from year to year;
not a hand placed on your cheek, not a whisper in your ear.
You can make it through okay, you can live and laugh, and flirt.
It's quite easy in the day; its just the nights that always hurt.
So let darkness come, 'cause that will be fine;
for I'll have a soul entangled in mine.
We'll do as we please, and please... hold me tight.
For I will be loved, I will be loved.
Yes, I will be loved tonight.





Hey There, Single Gut/Gal lyrics


Women 1 (spoken)
Go ahean Mory, make your toast.

Man 2 (spoken)
Right my toast, yes, a toast to our uh, not quite ready son Mitch,
and our too focused on her career or else she'd be our daugher, Karen.

Both
Here Here.
Hey there single gal, you're still single now.

Women 1
Tonight you'll still be sleeping all alone.

Both
But we don't pitty you, no no, not pretty you.
Cause your life belongs to no man its your own.

Man 2
You've got your friends so dear.

Women 1
Not to mention, your career.

Both
You don't need no guy to come knocking at your door. (oh oh oh)

Man 2
But we won't make a fuss.

Women 1
Cause you inspire us.

Both
Like Marlow Thomas and Mary Tyler Moore.
But hey there you're ok, women of today.

Man 2
You've got much more than mother ever had.

Women 1
You are so lucky.

Both
So go home get some sleep but pray you do not weep.

Women 1
Just curl up with some agendas, and be glad.

Both
Single Gal.
Hey there single guy, no need to clarify.

Women 1
Why a man of your age can't commit.

Both
It's fine with us my son, just drink dance have some fun.
We're your parents we support you. (spoken)
YOU LITTLE SHIT!

Man 2
Have you just lost your way?

Women 1
Repressed, confused, or gay?

Both
For once in your life give matramony, a whirl. (oh oh oh)

Women 1
So whatcha waiting you.

Man 2
So get on with mating you.

Both
What's wrong with her she seems like such a nice girl.
But we don't need to pry, relax you happy guy.
Adulthood's not a crucial as it seems.
For grandkids we can wait, no need to procreate.
Who care if you've destroyed your parents dreams,
Big career girl, wayward son, future spinster, dissapointment.
Here's to you.





Always a Bridesmaid lyrics


Well, I've walked down the aisle
As much as Liz Taylor
But I've always stood off to the side
Each bride has me dressed
In a gown I detest
Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.

For Caitlin, I wore satin
Which I looked really fat in.
Then again, you should have seen her man Ken;
All those calories he logged up
Til his arteries clogged up
He died on the couch watching ESPN.
Too many weddings, too many dresses
That all make my hips look so wide.
Not a gown I'd reuse
Ditto the matching shoes;
Always a bridesmaid
Never a bride.

For Tabitha, I wore taffetta
You should never people laugh at ya
But I had a hunch her marriage was doomed.
The groom tried to stroke me
While we danced the Hokey Pokey
They divorced before the honeymoon.

Once my gown was velourish
Made me look kind of whorish
But my best friend Delores
Was never quite same
She shot her new mister
Cuz he bedded her sister
He's not dead, but now he walks like John Wayne.
Too many weddings, too many dresses,
That all make my hips look so wide
My friends can't assess
A man or a dress
Always a bridesmaid
Never a bride.

When I look in my closet,
There's a rainbow deposit
Of gowns so grotesque that I groan
All those husbands are gone,
But those dresses live on,
Even moths seem to leave them alone.
Too many weddings, too many messes
But at least I've hung on to my pride.
I've lived life alone, but the terms are my own.
Always a bridesmaid, (thank you Lord!)
Never a bride!





Baby Song lyrics


Man 1:
Well, I dread that I'm regressing, with my head this baby's messing;
wee ba, dwee ba, doo ba, dab by doo.
Once I became a parent, I became quite incoherent;
ma ma, ma ma, da da, woo hoo hoo.
When I'm hurt, I get a boo boo, when I sleep, I
take a su su; nappy, nappy, nappy, sweepy swoo.
In the car I go, "Vroom, vroom, vroom"..
In the john I make a boom booom;
woppa, woppa, woppa, poo poo poo.
Can I stop this? God, I wish it, 'cause I sound just like a dip shit!
Yee ha, yee ha, yee ha, booby boo.
Now I hear my baby cry cry; so it's time that I go bye bye.
Doo ba, dabby, deeby, dubby, weeba, wooby, woo.


Hey There, Single Gut/Gal

Women 1 (spoken)
Go ahean Mory, make your toast.

Man 2 (spoken)
Right my toast, yes, a toast to our uh, not quite ready son Mitch,
and our too focused on her career or else she'd be our daugher, Karen.

Both
Here Here.
Hey there single gal, you're still single now.

Women 1
Tonight you'll still be sleeping all alone.

Both
But we don't pitty you, no no, not pretty you.
Cause your life belongs to no man its your own.

Man 2
You've got your friends so dear.

Women 1
Not to mention, your career.

Both
You don't need no guy to come knocking at your door. (oh oh oh)

Man 2
But we won't make a fuss.

Women 1
Cause you inspire us.

Both
Like Marlow Thomas and Mary Tyler Moore.
But hey there you're ok, women of today.

Man 2
You've got much more than mother ever had.

Women 1
You are so lucky.

Both
So go home get some sleep but pray you do not weep.

Women 1
Just curl up with some agendas, and be glad.

Both
Single Gal.
Hey there single guy, no need to clarify.

Women 1
Why a man of your age can't commit.

Both
It's fine with us my son, just drink dance have some fun.
We're your parents we support you. (spoken)
YOU LITTLE SHIT!

Man 2
Have you just lost your way?

Women 1
Repressed, confused, or gay?

Both
For once in your life give matramony, a whirl. (oh oh oh)

Women 1
So whatcha waiting you.

Man 2
So get on with mating you.

Both
What's wrong with her she seems like such a nice girl.
But we don't need to pry, relax you happy guy.
Adulthood's not a crucial as it seems.
For grandkids we can wait, no need to procreate.
Who care if you've destroyed your parents dreams,
Big career girl, wayward son, future spinster, dissapointment.
Here's to you.


On the Highway of Love 

Man 1
In my home i'm not the boss
With my kids i'm at a loss
My life seems close, but no cigar
I've been jilted by my lucky star
Well thank god, at least i've got my car


(dialogue)

Man1
when im drivin im the king of my domain
when im drivin im a beast without a chain
when im drivin im a force you cant restrain
but on the highway of love she's drivin me insane
woman 1
keep your eyes on the road

(man) keep your thoughts in your head

woman 1
keep your hands on the wheel

(man) shut your mouth or your dead

woman 1
i should've taken a cab

(man) you should've taken a pill

both
when automobiling we're not too appealing


kids
when their driving
all they ever do is complain
when their driving
its a verbal hurricane
when their driving we get a large migraine
on the highway of love their driving us insane!


(man 1 monologue)

(woman 2 monologue)


all
were losing our grip on this family trip
when were driving our fights are high octane
when were driving were obnoxious and profane
when were driving were in a lot of pain
on the highway of love we scream till were horse
on the highway of love they outta get a divorce
on the highway of love



man
forever shall i reign, woah, yea love ya babe!


Shouldn't I Be Less in Love With You?

Man: The experts say it does not last.
The experts say it's fleeting.
The experts bray love fades so fast
Then tell me why is my heart still beating?

Shouldn't I be less in love with you?
Shouldn't I address what time can do?
Shouldn't I be more inclined to flee?
Shouldn't I explore all I can be?

Shouldn't I confess a sorted fling?
Shouldn't I carress a cute young thing?
Shouldn't I asses what we've been through?
Shouldn't I be less in love with you?

After 30 years together
All those brutal fights
those futal fights
then the sleepless nights

Shouldn't I have quit 'cause marriage ends?
Shouldn't we have split like all our friends?
Shouldn't I profess it's time to go?
Shouldn't I be less in love with you?
No.

Woman: (spoken) What? 



또 이렇게 .. 나 또 여기에 ..
상처입고 또 줄걸 알면서
또다시 마음의 문을 여네 ..
사랑같은건 더이상 없어 -
맹세하고 해도 ...

또 이렇게 .. 나는 다시 여기에 ..
지겹게 해봤다 싶어도
언제나 새로운것이 사랑 ..
지치지도 않고 꿈꾸는 내맘
자랑스러운걸 ...

또 이렇게 나는 다시 여기에 -
사랑이란 잔인한 유혹 ,
두 팔 벌려 끌어 안고서
이제 지옥같은 천국을 향하여
돌아가는거야 -

또 이렇게 나는 다시 여기에 -
누가 알아 이번에는
사랑을 얻게 된대도
손에 잡히고나면 철없이 난
말할지도 모르네 -

사랑해 , 그대는 완벽해 ,
그래도 난 아쉬워 -
난 사랑해 , 그대는 완벽해 ,
그래도 난 아쉬워 -
난 사랑해 , 그대는 완벽해 ,
그래도 난 아쉬워 -
난 사랑해 , 그대는 완벽해 ,
하지만 난 아직도 부족해 -


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